Parenting Plans

The parenting plan or parenting agreement is the most important
document that parents will create. It is a legal document with the complete
force of the law behind it when it is filed with the court. It is also a
permanent and legally binding document that is required by the courts.
The mediator's role is to help parents develop a parenting plan that is
as fair as it can be to both parties. The parenting plan will cover numerous
items, and can be a few pages in duration, or, in some instances, up to twenty
pages in length. The mediator's role is to assist the parents in examining all
the decisions they need to incorporate in a parenting plan and to help the
parents in sharing the information necessary to make informed decisions.
When parents are confronting a divorce, they are required to cover
parental duties and privileges that now need to be examined individually. When
parents are going through a divorce (and this also applies to unmarried
parents), they are required to analyze parental responsibilities and future
matters involving their child(ren) that would have occurred over several years
had they remained married or together.
It is not unusual for parents to
be quite surprised at how time consuming and emotionally draining the working
out of a parenting plan can be. This is a key reason why parents choose to use
mediation early in their negotiation. The mediator's role is to supply the
format that includes the questions, information gathering, and sharing that
allows the parents to establish a parenting plan that meets their needs.
When parents complete the long and demanding process of a parenting
plan, they have a document that they can be proud of. The parenting plan sets
forth a commitment to the family, the child(ren)'s needs, and establishes a
family continuity for both the parents and their child(ren). It is not unusual
for parents to allow their child(ren) to read the parenting plan. The parenting
plan is written in simple language that can create a calming effect upon the
child(ren) and establish a sense of security by showing that their parents are
committed to working together on their future.